Sunday, March 29, 2009

Woke up on the night of Friday

On Friday night, I went to the Dharma Circle as usual. This time, the topic is on meditation. The speaker talks on the 4 conditions for sucess. Will, Effort, Focus, and reevaluation. And also on various other topics, like the 5 hindarances of meditation: anger, sensual desires, sloth and torpor, restlessness, and Doubt. And it made me realise that I wasn't thinking clearly since I came back from Vietnam. I was obsessed with studying, immersing myself in it and I'm not even bothered to acknowledge my mental existance.

I've stwiched from obsession to buddhism to obsession to studying. Thus, not allowing any time for me to think clearly, to be of clam mind, to be aware of what I'm doing. STPM was a good time where I was clam all the time, I know how to answer the questions and I'm good in my memories. Compared to now, I was mentally more advanced then.

So I realised that to suceed in my quest, I must not abandon the cultivation of the mind. I like training, I trained myself in terms of Buddhism, then in terms of Physics, and just recently in martial arts. Training has the strange ability to allow you to like what you are training on. And to hone the skills that would last as long as training lasted. It's not always happy while you're training, but looking at the end result and you're happy with it, you've not wasted your time training.

Training myself in the sense of controling my time, I have suceeded in doing the following things in the last week.
  • Gone to a Buddhist activity, the last Dharma Circle for this sem
  • Gone for training in Nam wah Pai
  • Played Badminton with Physoc people
  • Sleep around 4.4 hours each in 6 nights.
  • And slept 17 hours last night.
  • Managed at last to study more than 70 hours in a week.
  • Watched 2 movies.
  • Read story books.
  • Attended a Black hole talk
  • Gone for a interview,
  • Attended 2 more module talks,
  • Played some LEGO,
  • And done lots of homeworks.
So waking up, I know that I'm not a human studying machine, I'm a superhuman, capable of what I'm like to do! Ok fine, a lame thing to say. Now to add in the list, I want to have some time to write stories and meditate, and train on martial arts and physics more.

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